My mistakes.......

My mistakes.......

"Your eyes won't let my thoughts go back to sleep. Your words draw me across 2000 miles. I don't know you at all, and yet I know you better than my friends of many years. The days I spent with you are like a tape I play, rewind, play, rewind, and play. Whenever I remember something new, I feel as though you touched me on the cheek. I miss you as the grass awaits the wind, Or as the morning sky awaits the sun. Although I look for you in every doorway, I find only the darkness in my heart.
i wait for the day when we could meet each other again and only the thoughts bring smile of my face.................
now stop doing whatever u r doing and talk to me just me” I said that
"bhannus hajur k bhannu cha....me not doing anything m just chatting with you"he said

i was trying to pamper him "ok so risayeko ma sangha......but i know risayeni aafnai khusi huda ni afnai....timi mero sadhai bhari j gare ni afnai"

he burst out in laughter n said "how can i be angry with you?.....timro po ris nak ko tuppa ma cha...kurai nabuhi risauchau.....anyway choda na and tell me what u did today?...."...............

so simple...just like that we knew what we feel for each other...no need to explain any further...no need to say sorry......donno what kind of relation is that..........its much more than love itself.................

But never thought with situation our thoughts will change..........we will try to make each other understand n those words from heart will never reach another’s heart.............how much i cry aloud those tears had stopped reaching your eyes........


"Look me getting married and i don't want my past to come in between my wife n me...so stay away from my life...you're nothing for me now.....i can't go against my family......you're the one who made all mistakes......you're the one who brought this situation in our life..............things can't go on like you want.......i can't live in imagination or in dreams......i want to make my wife the most happiest women in this earth....so go away from my life.."he said ........

"if you never loved me why u said so many things for so many yrs.........why you stopped me when i was getting married......." my strength of patience finished there......."months back when u said you're getting married i compromised with my situation n lived my life...live through that moment.......n after moths u came back to say that me nothing.......you want to prove me that i mean nothing to you but for your kind information i do know that....if i meant something...or you would have respected my feelings you wouldn't have left me......."

"ya i said so many things and thats my childishness.........i said what u wanted to hear...."

"common what kind of childishness is that which destroyed someone's life....for nearly decade u said what i wanted to hear.......or did what i wanted u to do..........isn't that sound kind of funny?.........."

"Whatever u say......within moth me marrying.......and we are finished here......"

"of course we're finished so many times.........three moths back when u said you'r died for me then also i thought it was finished........but no you came back to tell me that me wrong.....blame me for everything..........ok you think i was wrong and i'd made mistake.........i deserved to be punished for ruining everything...........but you know you already punished me a lonely life.....whole life I’ll live alone isn't that enough......"

"Whatever but ya try to be a good ………….........n move on with life....."


hahaha and he blocked and deleted me again...............sounds funny.............but this is life.............my gr8 life............but from heart behind those arguments i wanted to say...........i never asked anything in return of my feelings for you...........just hoped that you'll be with me till end.............and when you left me .........i felt like i lost reason to live my life.......i felt so bad........so empty inside...........like m dying n second by second my breathes r going away from me........and m waiting to see you for once.........to hear that you love me too.........

Distances come in life...........bitterness comes in relation...........but always it isn't necessary that u spoil all your memories n take away the reason of living from your loved ones hand..........or i must say the person u abandoned........Sometimes i made mistake sometimes you did........i forgave you and you asked a big price for my one mistake........i just wanted to say...........me not god.........i can make mistakes too..........in some situations i can be weak too............but i never thought you'll leave me for my mistakes........but i never got chance to tell explain myself........whenever i tried to sometimes u didn't trust me....or sometimes anger was there in between us...........still i say all my mistake..........my mistakes..........