Feb 13, 2006
WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU….
SOMETIMES I THINK WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU…
WHY DO I MISS YOU SO MUCH???
IS IT BECAUSE YOU DON’T LOVE ME ANYMORE???
OR IS IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU MORE AND MORE???
SOMETIMES I THINK WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU…
WHY DO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH???
IS IT BECAUSE YOU LOVED ME SO MUCH???
OR IS IT BECAUSE I MISS YOU MORE AND MORE???
SOMETIMES I THINK WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU…
WHY DON’T YOU LOVE ME ANYMORE???
IS IT BECAUSE IT WAS THE VIRTUAL???
OR IS IT BECAUSE I WANTED TO MAKE IT REAL???
SOMETIMES I THINK WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU…
WHY DID YOU LOVE ME SO MUCH???
IT WAS JUST AN ILLUSION???
OR IT WAS A JUST MERE A YEAR LONG DELUSION???
SOMETIMES I THINK WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU…
WHY DON’T YOU FEEL AS YOU USED TO FEEL EARLIER???
IS IT BECAUSE OF MY MISTAKE THAT I COMMITTED LIKE EVERY OTHER LOVER???
OR IS IT YOU DON’T WANT TO BE WITH ONE WHO COMMITS MISTAKES???
SOMETIMES WHEN I THINK WHILE THINKING ABOUT YOU…
DID YOU EVER LOVE ME OR NOT???
YOU SAID IT WAS JUST A CRUSH???
OR YOU WERE IN RUSH TO HAVE A CRUSH???
NOW WHAT I THINK IS I NEVER DESERVED YOUR LOVE…
BUT THE THING IS THAT I WAS MORE THAN YOUR LIFE FOR SOMETIME…
YOU WILL REMAIN MY GOD FOREVER, WHOM I WILL NEVER EVER SEE…
BUT I WILL WORSHIP YOU TILL THE END…WORSHIP YOU TILL THE END OF LIFE…
Feb 9, 2006
Mail from my best Friend.....
My best wishes are there for you...............
(Sat, 19 Mar 2005 15:11:15 )
My dear Friend,
It was so easy for you to tell me to forget you. It is easy to tell theses words "forget me". But have you tried it on yourself? It is very difficult to do it. It was very very difficult for me to fall in love as well. How could I forget you? There is nothing, absolutely nothing that I can forget about you and me. There was a time in my life, when I allowed loneliness and isolation to become my habits. Loneliness and isolation became me. Because they gave me strange sense of security. You and your love brke through the bars of my prison and demand that I come out into the sunshine and live amongotherpeople and enjoy life. I told you time and again, that I do not believe in love. I told you many times, that I was hurt in my past. But I do not know, some how, you were able to win my heart. I started to believe you and in your love. Very slowly you became a very important person. But now......?I feel as if the worst that could possibly happen to me has alrerady happened and I have lived through it. More than that, I have found out that what ever happens, I cannot stop myself from going on living. My heart goes on beating even though I know that it is broken, my lungs go on pumping the air and I have to have food even though i do not feel like eating.....It is well said that we hurt the ones that we love. I am sorry if what I am doing hurts you. But you know, strength comes from facing pain, from dealing it. Pain is the part and the parcel of being human. So I guess, it is always like this. To get a heart broken time and again. Just because we are human.We used to be comfortable together and we used to communicate openly. But today there is a tension and that makes me weigh my every word before I speak. I do not know what went wrong..... But I know it hurts to feel this way and I wish we could go back to yesterday and find each other the same people we were back then. But.....????It is true that we do not know what we have got until we have lost it. I did not want to say good bye to you. Because I wanted to try. I did not want to give it up. Because I believe that if you love some one then you should never let it go. I wanted to try so badly, but I guess I was too late...I haven't got any choice at all. I will wait for you because you are worth for. I want you to remember that. You are worth for it. One day,there will be some one else in your live. But I know that you will still remember me and one part of you will always love me.All I will say to you, is go for some one who can make you smile because I think only a smile can bright up the dark hours. I hope you will find that person who makes you smile. May you have enough happiness. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past. You cannot go on well with life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.We can always be friends. If you ever need me then you know where to find me. Just remember that I have not stopped loving you.
Sincerely,
...........
(Sat, 19 Mar 2005 15:11:15 )
My dear Friend,
It was so easy for you to tell me to forget you. It is easy to tell theses words "forget me". But have you tried it on yourself? It is very difficult to do it. It was very very difficult for me to fall in love as well. How could I forget you? There is nothing, absolutely nothing that I can forget about you and me. There was a time in my life, when I allowed loneliness and isolation to become my habits. Loneliness and isolation became me. Because they gave me strange sense of security. You and your love brke through the bars of my prison and demand that I come out into the sunshine and live amongotherpeople and enjoy life. I told you time and again, that I do not believe in love. I told you many times, that I was hurt in my past. But I do not know, some how, you were able to win my heart. I started to believe you and in your love. Very slowly you became a very important person. But now......?I feel as if the worst that could possibly happen to me has alrerady happened and I have lived through it. More than that, I have found out that what ever happens, I cannot stop myself from going on living. My heart goes on beating even though I know that it is broken, my lungs go on pumping the air and I have to have food even though i do not feel like eating.....It is well said that we hurt the ones that we love. I am sorry if what I am doing hurts you. But you know, strength comes from facing pain, from dealing it. Pain is the part and the parcel of being human. So I guess, it is always like this. To get a heart broken time and again. Just because we are human.We used to be comfortable together and we used to communicate openly. But today there is a tension and that makes me weigh my every word before I speak. I do not know what went wrong..... But I know it hurts to feel this way and I wish we could go back to yesterday and find each other the same people we were back then. But.....????It is true that we do not know what we have got until we have lost it. I did not want to say good bye to you. Because I wanted to try. I did not want to give it up. Because I believe that if you love some one then you should never let it go. I wanted to try so badly, but I guess I was too late...I haven't got any choice at all. I will wait for you because you are worth for. I want you to remember that. You are worth for it. One day,there will be some one else in your live. But I know that you will still remember me and one part of you will always love me.All I will say to you, is go for some one who can make you smile because I think only a smile can bright up the dark hours. I hope you will find that person who makes you smile. May you have enough happiness. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past. You cannot go on well with life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.We can always be friends. If you ever need me then you know where to find me. Just remember that I have not stopped loving you.
Sincerely,
...........
Feb 7, 2006
Secret garden
open the door on my dear shelter.
A place where the sun casts shadows
and stars are growing like... flowers...
and silently..., the wind is dancing in me.
I feel alive, I feel myself,
under my weeping willow...
- - - - - -
When everything goes wrong,
when the stress is your best friend,
when you can't remember your name,
open the door of your garden, and feel the serenity.
I won't do a poll, but, let me know : What's the TREE of YOUR secret garden ?
So, it's done... and submited. And I feel like if I was naked front of you.
Every of my drawings is a striptease... sharing my art, I share myself, my feelings, my fears, my wishes...
luckily it's just piece of art
. Or maybe I am just a narcissistic person... why not
Poems(All about Friend N Friendship)
Life without Friendship
Life without friendship....
is like the dawn without the sun.
Life without friendship....
is like the sky without the moon
when the evening has begun.
Life without friendship....
is like a rose without rain.
Life without friendship....
just wouldn't be the same.
Life without friendship....
is like a ship without a sea.
Life without friendship....
just could not be
without a friend like you for me.
Far away friends
I will never forget
That time you helped me out
The time I was distraught
And you were there
We had chatted before
In a superficial way
Jokes and smiles with
Flattery and pleasantries
But on that night
We chatted for hours
You brought a smile to my face
And I needed that
It was that night
That cemented our friendship
Although we had not met
We became close friends
I know so much about you
And yet so very little
You almost know everything there is
To know about me
Although we are miles apart
In so many ways
My heart feels so close
To you, my dear friend
For You...My Friend
To some people, a friend is practically anyone they know. To me, friendship means a much closer relationship,one in which you take the time to really understand each other.
A friend is someone you trust enough to share a part of yourself the rest of the world may never see.
When it comes to friendship, it's quality not quantity
With you I know I have the very Best!
A special prayer
Every evening
as I'm laying here in bed
This little prayer keeps running
through my mortal head
God bless my mom and dad
and bless my little child
and take care of my spouse
when things start gettin wild....
and God there's one more thing
I wish that you could do
hope ya don't mind me askin'
but 'PLEASE' bless my 'puter too??
Now I know that it's not normal
to bless a mother board
but listen just a second
while I explain to you, "MY LORD"
you see, that little metal box
holds more than odds and ends.
inside those small components
rest a hundred of my 'BEST FRIENDS'
Some it's true I've never seen
and most I've never met
we've never shaken hands
or shared a meal as yet...
I know for sure they like me
by the kindnesses that they give
and this little scrap of metal
is how I travel to where they live.
by faith is how I know them
much the same as I know you.
I share in what life brings them
from that our friendship grew.
'PLEASE' take an extra minute
from your duties up above...
to bless this hunk of metal
that's filled with so much love.
My Cyber Friend
I haven't ever seen you,
but I know you're really there;
I click you into reality
Like magic from the air.
Your voice is like an angel,
Though I really do not hear;
Your hug as warm as any
Of loved ones I hold dear.
You're always there for comfort,
Or a word of cheer;
Though you are very far away,
I always have you near.
You're a very special friend,
Like none I've ever known;
As long as you're in cyberspace
I'll never be alone.
Friendship
Friendship is a strange thing....we find ourselves telling each other the deepest details of our lives...things we don't even share with our families who raised us...But what is a friend? A confidant? A lover? A fellow email junkie? A shoulder to cry on? an ear to listen? a heart to feel?...A friend is all these things...and more. No matter where we met,....I call you friend. A word so small...yet so large in feeling...a word filled with emotion. It is true great things come in small packages.
Once the package of friendship has been opened, it can never be closed...it is a constant book always written... waiting to be read...and enjoyed
We may have our disagreements...we may argue...we may concern one another... friendship is a unique bond that lasts through it all.... A part of me is put into my friends... some it is my humor...some it is my listening ear...some it is real life experiences...some it is my romanticism...but with all, it is friendship. Friendships forged are a construct stronger than steel built as a foundation....necessary for life...and necessary for love. :-)
Friends, you and me.... you brought another friend... and then there were 3... we started our group... Our circle of friends... and like that circle... there is no beginning or end.. Keep this going.... Email all your friends this message.... Email all those friends you never met.... Those you have... and those you've lost along the way... This is to all wonderful people I have met personally or online!
A friend is a treasure
A friend is someone we turn to, When our spirits need a lift. A friend is someone we treasure, For our friendship is a gift. A friend is someone who fills our lives, With beauty, joy, and grace. And makes the world we live in, a better and happier place
Ode to a Friend
When you are sad
I will dry your tears
When you are scared
I will comfort your fears
When you are worried
I will give you hope
When you are confused
I will help you cope
and when you are lost
and can't see the light
I shall be your beacon
shining ever so bright
This is my oath
I pledge till the end
Why you may ask
because you're a friend.
Oh Help Me Here
Still I feel the same pain
doesn't need to get physical
it grows by day & by night
through my eyes cries in fright.
They all say because they can
could they have ever understood
I wish they all had known
how much do i feel the pain.
Shall I ever be happy again
a slight utter of your name here
it hurts I feel like falling down
if its not you, you are still my warm gown.
Here I am alone, hurt & down
you are all that it is to me
all that ever can bring me back up
I know you understand my pain is my love.
-------------------------------------------------------
everytime i think i missed her
search her in my soul
i found thee my love
and know i didn't missed her
no need to find her here n there
when i know she's inside me
and share everyting with her
because she's a part of me
but still if i've to feel the phsical touch
yes i do miss her and know i'll
but what's use to get things all in real
when there's virtual world tooo
where your every desires come true
and nothing is left behind...
i love to be in dreams because i know
this world sucks and makes me feel sorrow
so i prefer to be in dreams and addicted in love
doesn't need to get physical
it grows by day & by night
through my eyes cries in fright.
They all say because they can
could they have ever understood
I wish they all had known
how much do i feel the pain.
Shall I ever be happy again
a slight utter of your name here
it hurts I feel like falling down
if its not you, you are still my warm gown.
Here I am alone, hurt & down
you are all that it is to me
all that ever can bring me back up
I know you understand my pain is my love.
-------------------------------------------------------
everytime i think i missed her
search her in my soul
i found thee my love
and know i didn't missed her
no need to find her here n there
when i know she's inside me
and share everyting with her
because she's a part of me
but still if i've to feel the phsical touch
yes i do miss her and know i'll
but what's use to get things all in real
when there's virtual world tooo
where your every desires come true
and nothing is left behind...
i love to be in dreams because i know
this world sucks and makes me feel sorrow
so i prefer to be in dreams and addicted in love
Confused ....Love Story!
A couple years ago, while chatting online, I came across many different and very interesting people.
I never thought of I-Ming (instant messaging) anybody. I was in a chat room one night, and this guy was chatting. she seemed like somebody so compatible with me.
So, I decided to give this instant messenger a try. Not knowing i was going to fall head of heels in love with this man, I I-Med her and simply said hello. That's when it all started. We began to chat more frequently, than it turned into every night, and after that, every spare minute we had in a day. The only reason I would really go online was to chat with her. I barely knew her but my love grew more and more day by day.
When I would tell people about it, they would think I was crazy to have fallen for this complete stranger. Yet, they didn't understand how deeply I felt for him. When I would see her screen name sign on, i would get tingles all over, and butterflies in my tummy. one or two years passed and this stranger was still in my heart. One night, I decided to call her. Since she lived far away, we couldn't talk on the phone much because my parents and her would see this unfamiliar number on the phone bill. The first time I heard his voice on the phone, I got this feeling that i can't even describe. For the first time in my life, I had been completely speechless. Words no longer existed. After that, we chatted more. I didn't think she felt for me, as i had for her. To my surprise, one night she told me how much I meant to her, and that she had to be with me. She told me that no one had ever made her smile on the worst days. No one could calm her down when she was angry, as I had. she told me that he thought of me every single moment. And I was more in love with her than I knew.
After chatting for 2 years or so, she told me she was in love with me, but I didn't believe it. I didn't believe how 2 complete strangers could fall in love. Conversations would come up about seeing each other and we would plan everything, or I would at least. And when that day would come for us to meet, something would come up. This went on a couple more times. One day she disappeared and for a couple months I didn't talk to her. But not a day went by that I wouldn't think of her. I saw her online one night, and I thought this was my only chance to tell her how I had felt. I told her I was in love with her. And she was shocked. she said, she felt the same, but I didn't think so. I have stopped trying to work it out with her. I have given up. I guess you can say I moved on, new loves have came and left. But none have left such an impact on my life as she has. And still to this day, I think of her every day.
Sometimes, I cry. I wish someday I could finally meet this stranger that I have loved for so long. I asked her one day why she wouldn't meet me, and she told me, I know if I meet you, I'm going to get attached to you, and there's no way we can be together because we live so far from one another. But I know deep in my heart that I'll see her one day, and when I do, I'll never let her go because I love her.
"Confused Girl"
I never thought of I-Ming (instant messaging) anybody. I was in a chat room one night, and this guy was chatting. she seemed like somebody so compatible with me.
So, I decided to give this instant messenger a try. Not knowing i was going to fall head of heels in love with this man, I I-Med her and simply said hello. That's when it all started. We began to chat more frequently, than it turned into every night, and after that, every spare minute we had in a day. The only reason I would really go online was to chat with her. I barely knew her but my love grew more and more day by day.
When I would tell people about it, they would think I was crazy to have fallen for this complete stranger. Yet, they didn't understand how deeply I felt for him. When I would see her screen name sign on, i would get tingles all over, and butterflies in my tummy. one or two years passed and this stranger was still in my heart. One night, I decided to call her. Since she lived far away, we couldn't talk on the phone much because my parents and her would see this unfamiliar number on the phone bill. The first time I heard his voice on the phone, I got this feeling that i can't even describe. For the first time in my life, I had been completely speechless. Words no longer existed. After that, we chatted more. I didn't think she felt for me, as i had for her. To my surprise, one night she told me how much I meant to her, and that she had to be with me. She told me that no one had ever made her smile on the worst days. No one could calm her down when she was angry, as I had. she told me that he thought of me every single moment. And I was more in love with her than I knew.
After chatting for 2 years or so, she told me she was in love with me, but I didn't believe it. I didn't believe how 2 complete strangers could fall in love. Conversations would come up about seeing each other and we would plan everything, or I would at least. And when that day would come for us to meet, something would come up. This went on a couple more times. One day she disappeared and for a couple months I didn't talk to her. But not a day went by that I wouldn't think of her. I saw her online one night, and I thought this was my only chance to tell her how I had felt. I told her I was in love with her. And she was shocked. she said, she felt the same, but I didn't think so. I have stopped trying to work it out with her. I have given up. I guess you can say I moved on, new loves have came and left. But none have left such an impact on my life as she has. And still to this day, I think of her every day.
Sometimes, I cry. I wish someday I could finally meet this stranger that I have loved for so long. I asked her one day why she wouldn't meet me, and she told me, I know if I meet you, I'm going to get attached to you, and there's no way we can be together because we live so far from one another. But I know deep in my heart that I'll see her one day, and when I do, I'll never let her go because I love her.
"Confused Girl"
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